This is my life … This is my journey

IMG_20150309_183129319I’ve spent a lifetime self-destructing in very public ways. I’m hoping others will learn what it was like, what happened and what it is like now for me. It isn’t necessary to completely lose it all before saying … “this is where the madness ends”. Life is about more than breathing… it’s about feeling alive. Here starts the blog journey…

My “crash and burn” moment happened September 2013.  I was living in an oceanfront condo in Florida with a pug named Shmuli and not much else. I had destroyed my latest marriage and everything else that crossed my path…. no more wife, no more money, no more kids, no more friends…. just me, the pug, a Mercedes Benz and my best friend Anita! I thank God for Anita!

On September 29th, 2013 (my daughter’s birthday) I decided to do something I had not done in years. I picked up the phone and dialed my parents for help. My options were to get help or commit suicide. Something was going to happen and it was going to happen that day. I could not exist as I was for another 24 hours. Fortunately, my mother answered the phone and made arrangements for me to enter long term treatment. Anita packed a suitcase and my father and I flew off to Rancho Mirage, California where I began the process of recovery…

I’ve often said that “I’ve done everything except Micheal Jackson!” … early on I learned how to smoke, drink, drug and even steal ashtrays from hotel rooms where I committed adultery! My life is what it is and I make no apologies for it. My closets are empty by design… once I realized I had nothing to hide… I had nothing to fear…. I was free!

This blog is not about the past … I don’t live there any more …  it’s about living every moment that I’m given and hopefully contributing to others that struggle with addiction.

Feel free to ask me any question and I’ll answer it honestly as possible.

This is how my sober life began …